Amid the chaos that is inevitable in a home such as ours, I have much to be thankful for. I have been particularly blessed lately by the conversations that I've been having with my 8-year-old. He is a deep thinker. He really wants to know the truth about God and the Bible and eternal matters. He wants to obey, to please God, to forsake his sin. But he is constantly brought back to a place of being reminded of his sinfulness. And sometimes he seems even tortured by the battle. His passions run high. He is strong-willed and challenges authority. He is a natural-born leader and people-person. And yet he has such a tenderness in his heart to the things of God. He regularly takes his Bible to school and reads it to his classmates. He shares the truth about God's word as he is learning it at home and in church. He is concerned that he might not be telling his friends all the right things. He keeps coming back and asking me, "So what exactly are the things I should be telling my friends that they need to know to get to heaven?"
Recently he asked me if I had a choice for Jesus to return right now or sometime in the distant future, which would I choose. I thought briefly before answering. And I said, "Right now, of course!" I can remember being his age and tormented by the thought of death and eternity. While I knew the right answer would be to choose heaven rather than stay here on earth, I remember really wanting earth more. I wanted to fall in love and get married and have babies. I had much to look forward to that I didn't want to miss. And I didn't really look forward to dying!
I'd like to think that my answer now is due to the fact that I truly love the Lord so much that I can't wait to be in His presence. In my heart, I think that is my honest motivation. And I wonder if that has something to do with the fact that I have fallen in love, gotten married, and had babies. I have also tasted the bitter parts and felt the pain that comes from living in a sinful, corrupt world. My fair portion, I think, although I can say with confidence that there will be more to come. While on the one hand I still have so much to look forward to in this life, I have been blessed to have reached some of the major milestones that I have always dreamed of. And I would be happy, even thankful to the Lord if He were to bring it all to an abrupt end by returning or calling me to be with Him.
Some might call this musing a little bit morbid. Perhaps it is. But this is my point, I think: I have no greater joy than this, to hear of my children walking in the truth. (3 John 1:4) I am not only confident that we are leading our children to walk in God's truth, but I am hopeful that they will desire to do so even after we are gone. And whether we go now or 50 years from now, or if Christ returns before then, I have that desire in my heart and it gives me hope and joy to see it begin to show signs of fruit in their lives now.
06 April 2010
Well it seems that ever since I went from one blog to two, my frequency of posting has nearly come to a standstill! I could blame it on a lot of things. Right now my excuse is that we're out of batteries. Every batter-operated thing: toys, TV remote, camera, has run out of juice at the same time. Actually, I took the batteries out of the camera to put into my computer's wireless mouse so it would still function. And now even those batteries are fading. (Sigh.) So that's all. Nothing profound to write today. Just thought I'd update y'all on a little-known fact of our lives today. (Please e-mail me if you know of any good battery coupons or deals going on!)